LONDON RIOTS. Work No. 499; The Apprentice

The Tottenham Apprentice
c. Michael St.Mark, August 2011

.. spots a gap in the market.


When a Prime Minister orders the invasion of another country not threatening this one in the least, that involves the murder of thousands of innocents, to facilitate the plunder of its vast oil reserves in order to appease an American president of dubious morals and to secure his own personal career through future directorships on boards of companies affiliated to those gifted the oil contracts…
When nasty business bully boys like Alan “I’m just a Jewish schmuck” Sugar are seen by millions to be promoting the most ably lying and scheming, the most aggressively devious, dishonest and manipulating...and now sits in the House of Lords…
In a country where blocking of opportunity for its youth by absence of post secondary school apprenticeship placement schemes ( as are ‘de rigueur’ in Germany and proven to lead to self esteem-generating high skill jobs );  where politically correct anti-discipline insanity, a general dumbing-down and a vicious dog-eat-dog mentality has been overseen and indeed overlooked by generations of crooked self-serving politicians….
( ” There is no such thing as society ” Margaret Thatcher 1970s.)
In a media chock-full of gratuitous violence,  portrayed and promoted via computer games,TV ads, news, the press & film; gangsta rap culture and glorification of ill-gotten bling…
In a nation more class-divided than any other on earth and  more than ever partitioned between haves & nots; where in the workplace impassable glass ceilings are the norm, where opportunity and promotion based on a very specific – yet  unmentionable for fear of being branded a fascist – racial nepotism; on privilege or birth rather than on talent and ability… is absolutely widespread. ( And you wonder why there are so few watchable new programmes on TV these days?)…

In such a severely dysfunctional and disjointed culture, is this sick new “loot-til-you-drop” perversion – and some might argue rather logical progression of much-lauded ruthless entrepreneurism and blind worship of everyone-for-themselves narrow materialism – really any great wonder?

Not mentioning those Old Etonian pinstriped piggies scrabbling and scoffing at the City trough either! – Ed



18 thoughts on “LONDON RIOTS. Work No. 499; The Apprentice

  1. you are right of course, it would be a fitting thing to do. But i couldn’t do it, i literaly could not pick it up and pocket it, never mind what i intended to do with it after that. Sorry but that’s just me, though i’m sure there are thousands out there who could do what you suggest—–maybe you would? 😀


    • …I’d give the cash to a related pensioners’ compensation legal fight fund and send his credit cards/personal effects back to him by registered mail along with a terse note informing him about the cash.
      But as this would be classed as a criminal act in law, I must prefix the above with ” …in an ideal world ”
      Crafty aint I? 😉


      • Crafty? in an ideal world?—- this must be classed as cheating !:D:D

        how could i possibly have known you were talking hypothetically, as you and i know there is no such thing as an ideal world! lol.

        I’ve enjoyed this little debate, got any more???


      • I see some bright spark had the idea to wheel on the landed and loaded Prince of Wales with his horse, and today playboy Prince Harry to do walkabouts in Tottenham and Salford. I bet the burnt-out shop keepers and home-owners really appreciated those little “jestures”.


      • Oh yes, i bet they were well made up! after all who wouldn’t be when a poor excuse for a prince and his numpty of a son take time out of their oh so busy lives to let you fawn all over them!

        I bet after they’d left the people were nodding their heads sagely at each other and saying ‘crikey i feel so much better now, my optimism in humans is fully restored!’ —–what a farce.


  2. you accuse moi of cheating 😀 😀

    My answers would probably be the same!

    If i was walking down the street and ‘Fred the Shred’ dropped a big fat wallet bulging with [what i assumed] was money he had extracted from people dishonestly i would still pick it up and give it back to him.

    My keeping the wallet and money would not be right for ME, the fact that fingers Fred had taken if from others is irrelevant. I would still be doing wrong by keeping it, in fact i would be stooping to his level, i refer to the old saying ‘two wrongs don’t make a right’

    Is that any better? 😀


    • If its right for you fair enough!
      Yet I hear my Mr Devil’s Advocate voice again prompting me; you don’t maybe think perhaps giving Fred’s wad to a pensioners’ legal fund, to help them win their right to compensation from the government… might be a bit more fitting?


  3. I would choose A, because i wouldn’t neccessarily know who he was therefore i would give him his wallet back. For all i knew he may have just been to pick up his mothers pension and this is what he had dropped. Even if i knew who he was i would still hand it back, it is not up to me to mete out justice by keeping the money.

    If i picked B then i would taking something which wasn’t mine to give to someone who wasn’t entitled to it.

    I consider myself to be an honest person and couldn’t pick up a wallet in the street and pocket it. Therefore i would never pick C, how would i live with myself if i did this? i would be acting as bad as ‘Fred the Shred’ in taking someone elses belongings.

    So obviously from what i have written i will have to say B and C are dishonest, but of course that is only my opinion.

    which scenario would you pick and why?


  4. The invisible man strikes again!

    If you’re big [and disgusting] enough to go looting from hard working peoples businesses then you’re big enough to show your face to the rest of us.

    There’s never a good time to be a thief, be it a lowlife swiping things from supermarkets, an uncaring looter during riots, or a ‘person’ who retires from his well paid job, with a massive bonus and a very comfortable pension, after he has ‘robbed’ hard working, honest people of their pittance of a pension into which they have paid for about 40 years.

    dishonesty is dishonesty in whatever guise it comes in and it should be deplored.


    • Okaaay. But playing devil’s advocate for a second; if you happened to be walking behind ‘Fred the Shred’ one fine day and you saw a thick wallet drop out of the back pocket of his Savile Row trousers, would you A)pick it up and hand it back to him? B ) give the contents to a charity of your choice? C) Keep it and treat the kids? and D ) Which of the above, if any, would you say would be being dishonest?


      • Hi,

        Interesting scenario.I have to say though that I would give him his fat wallet back if only to set an example – although i would not be disapproving of any who chose to keep it and redistribute the wealth Robin Hood style.

        I like you can see parallels between the “shoplifting mentality” in the riots and Bankers and politicians stealing from us. And it is notable how different the societal reaction is. When the Bankers do it we feel aggrieved but powerless to do anything.

        Morality is not in reality always so black and white – it is often conditional learning and self defined.


    • Great compare indigo!
      Fred “the shred” retires in bonus luxury after bringing HSBC to its knees and thousands of pensioners’ retirement pots in the process – and some naughty kid who picked up a bottle of sherry rolling out of a looted shop gets his mug plastered all over the Sun comic for the nation to revile, and a criminal record to boot.
      Examples are being set on behalf of Cameron and the establishment by the pervy magistrates.

      Not a good time to be a petty thief just now 😦


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